Study: Life On Earth Has 1.75 Billion Years Left

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DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Study: Life On Earth Has 1.75 Billion Years Left

A new study found that our planet will remain habitable for life forms for at least the next 1.75 billion years, after which the sun’s increasing heat will burn off all the liquid water on the planet and render Earth unfit for life to exist. What do you think?

  • “Is the moon going to be okay?”

    Buck Schuler
    Kennel Attendant
  • “So long, credit card debt!”

    Lucille Shepherd
    Ice Cream Truck Driver
  • “I bet we can get that down to a clean 1 billion.”

    Keith Fleischmann