Study: Men With Smaller Gonads Are Better Dads

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Vol 49 Issue 37

Out That Innie!

Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. CDT Cash and prizes are awarded to contestants who, through a combination of holding their breath and clenching really hard, are able to push their belly buttons out.

Onion Sports’ NFL Week Two Picks

Onion Sports’ NFL Week Two Picks OSN shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in this weekend’s NFL week two games: Jets at Patriots OSN’s Lock Of The Week: Patriots — Expect Pat...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

Study: Men With Smaller Gonads Are Better Dads

Researchers at Emory University found that men with smaller testicles were more involved fathers and helped to a greater extent with parenting duties than men with large testicles. What do you think?

  • “Maybe I’ll tone down the ‘great dad’ stuff a bit in public. Thanks for the heads-up.”

    Kris Kellow
    Orthodontic Band Maker
  • “Explains my dad. He only ever talked about himself and his giant testicles.”

    Penny Gallavan
    Kick Press Operator
  • “Hmm. I’ve only got one testicle, but it’s huge.”

    Albert Mitchell
    Ceramic Restorer
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