Study: Smokers Bad For Workplace

In This Section

Vol 43 Issue 34

Pain Medication Use Skyrocketing

Since 1997, the use of prescription painkillers in the United States has risen 88 percent, and oxyxocone, the main ingredient in OxyContin, has...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Partying

Comfort

  • The Onion’s Guide To Beach Etiquette

    The arrival of summer means that the nation’s beaches will soon be crowded with swimmers, tanners, surfers, and more, so it’s important for everyone to be conscious of each other’s space and needs. Here are some etiquette tips to ensure that everyone has a safe and relaxing time at the beach:

Study: Smokers Bad For Workplace

A new study shows that smokers have a poorer-than-average work performance and call in sick more than non-smokers. What do you think?
  • "I smoke and it doesn't affect my performance at work. Even if it did, I can quit my job anytime."

    Ryan Van Duyne
    Admissions Officer
  • "I don't see what's wrong with wanting to take a few days to yourself to get some important smoking done."

    Arch Potts
    Mobile Disc Jockey
  • "I think this can all be solved if smokers simply switch to pipes. Who doesn't appear smarter and more productive with a pipe?"

    Pepper Day
    Neurosurgeon
Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More