Study: Too Much TV Can Lead To Early Death

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Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.

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Study: Too Much TV Can Lead To Early Death

According to an eight-year study published by the Journal of the American Heart Association, people who excessively watch television have a significantly higher risk of premature death from cardiovascular disease, cancer, and other causes than those who don’t. What do you think?

  • “Hey, somebody’s got to be out there every day, risking his or her life to watch all these shows.”

    Rob Murray
    Panel Moderator
  • “But what about those times my heart races during a romantic monologue? Is that not exercise?”

    Jennifer Volness
    Piano Teacher
  • “How cruel that these people are robbed of so many years that could be filled with watching more TV.”

    Henry Jacobson
    Car Wash Supervisor
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