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Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
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Supercomputer On 'Jeopardy'

IBM, the company that built master chess computer Deep Blue, is working on a new machine that developers hope can participate in Jeopardy. What do you think?
  • "That's stupid. The only reason to watch Jeopardy is to see how people write out their names."

    Amanda Albert Systems Analyst
  • "Yes! It's gonna work, and those IBM guys will be laughing all the way to the bank with their Jeopardy winnings."

    Mike Kuban Dog Walker
  • "Winning at chess and Jeopardy is all well and good, but I’ll be impressed when a computer can beat the Philadelphia Eagles—in Philadelphia.”

    Kevin Hicks Rail Inspector

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