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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Supreme Court Hinders Consumer Rights To Sue

The U.S. Supreme Court ruled last week that companies could force dissatisfied customers into individual arbitration and prevent them from banding together in a class-action lawsuit. What do you think?

  • "Arbitration! Now there's my golden ticket to minor gains."

    Lydia Kivacevic Bath Mix Operator
  • "Call me old-fashioned, but I still like to deal with my issues with companies by reaming out one of their lowest-level employees who had absolutely nothing to do with the problem and possesses no ability to resolve the matter whatsoever."

    Rory Parsons Systems Analyst
  • "Mmm…Supreme Court. Ugh. Great! Now I'm aroused."

    Morgan Ball Facility Examiner
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