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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Supreme Court: Police Can Take DNA During Arrests

The Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that police can swab a suspect for DNA during an arrest—though prior to any trial or potential conviction—in cases of a “serious offense,” with Justice Antonin Scalia joining three liberal justices in dissent. What do you think?

  • “I should get arrested with my son to see if he’s really mine.”

    Tad Pollard Pottery Worker
  • “Wait, only ‘serious offenses’? Then why did that meter maid run her finger along the inside of my mouth?”

    Alexander Mitchum Veneer Gluer
  • “Looks like Scalia is just another traitor. By my count, that’s nine traitors on the Supreme Court.”

    Rebecca Kane Unemployed

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