adBlockCheck

Recent News

National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
End Of Section
  • More News

Supreme Court: Police Need Warrant To Search Cell Phones

In a landmark victory for digital privacy rights, the Supreme Court ruled unanimously Wednesday that police need to get a warrant before searching the cell phone of a person they’ve arrested. What do you think?

  • “It’s always so exciting when a ruling is unanimous!”

    Aimee Fletcher Hair Piece Fitter
  • “This sends a clear signal to the authorities that if you spend decades systematically eroding our civil liberties, eventually the Supreme Court will step in and defend them in a very limited and largely symbolic way.”

    Clint Bernard Campground Maintenance Worker
  • “That’s right. If police want to browse through my cell phone pictures they can go to DougsBirdPhotos.tumblr.com like everyone else.”

    Jeff Brooks-Volkmann Bake Sale Organizer

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close