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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Supreme Court: Public Meetings Can Have Opening Prayer

The Supreme Court voted Monday to allow public meetings at all levels of government to begin with an opening prayer, a decision many have criticized as violating the First Amendment clause forbidding the government from favoring certain religions or favoring believers over non-believers. What do you think?

  • “Okay, but only Christian prayer. No need to go overboard.”

    Casey Helms Phone Line Inspector
  • “That’s fine. I’m sure beginning public meetings with a reminder that all who do not accept the blood of Christ are consigned to eternal damnation will not have a chilling effect on anyone who doesn’t share those beliefs.”

    Jennifer Keeling Private Investigator
  • “Whatever it takes to pack in those crowds.”

    Bill Waterstone Cutlery Sharpener

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