Swiss Vote Down New Minarets

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Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.

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Swiss Vote Down New Minarets

Voters in Switzerland passed a referendum banning the construction of new Muslim prayer towers. What do you think?
  • "Who knew that a nation full of uptight pricks could also be really intolerant?"

    Matt King
    Piece Trimmer
  • "I guess there are some Swiss who believe Islamic customs are a threat to their national identity. This is all very eye-opening to me, because I never even knew there was a Swiss national identity."

    Lynda Weitz
    Unemployed
  • "Can’t say I blame them. It's a slippery slope between calling for prayer and hanging sheets and underpants up there to dry."

    Nick Lovetro
    Bucket Operator
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