T. Rex Skeleton Put Up For Auction At Casino

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Vol 45 Issue 41

Community Gives Up Following Tragedy

FORT SCOTT, KS—"Honestly, I don't see the people of Fort Scott looking to one another for solace during this trying time, or really looking to one another for anything ever again," said mayor Thomas Dietrich.

Parents Against Swine Flu Vaccine

An Associated Press poll shows that 38 percent of all parents do not want their children vaccinated against the H1N1 virus, or swine flu. What do...
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Comfort

  • The Onion’s Guide To Beach Etiquette

    The arrival of summer means that the nation’s beaches will soon be crowded with swimmers, tanners, surfers, and more, so it’s important for everyone to be conscious of each other’s space and needs. Here are some etiquette tips to ensure that everyone has a safe and relaxing time at the beach:

Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

T. Rex Skeleton Put Up For Auction At Casino

A nearly complete skeleton of a Tyrannosaurus rex found in South Dakota was put up for auction at the Venetian casino in Las Vegas last weekend. What do you think?
  • "What if you just want a couple of bones, for soup?"

    Sampson Mooney
    Die-Maker Apprentice
  • "I think I'll just keep playing the slots until I win one."

    Tara Czukay
    Tour Agent
  • "And to think, just 65 million years ago, that majestic animal likely had some dignity.”

    Joseph Schmidt
    Galvanizer
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