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Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
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Taco Bell Introduces Breakfast Menu

In an effort to compete with McDonald’s and other fast food restaurants offering breakfast, Taco Bell has announced that it will begin serving a breakfast menu starting on March 27 with items such as the “Waffle Taco” and the “A.M. Crunchwrap.” What do you think?

  • “McDonald’s is so fucked.”

    Gail Benedict Unemployed
  • “I just don’t know if they’ll be able to pull off that authentic waffle taco flavor you find in Mexico.”

    Neil Patimkin Patrol Officer
  • “When are they gonna finally come out with a burger?”

    Max Scapelle Machine Operator

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