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Politics

Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

Joe Arpaio’s Family Surprises Him With Detained Hispanic Motorist

FOUNTAIN HILLS, AZ—In celebration of the dismissal of his conviction for criminal contempt via presidential pardon, Joe Arpaio’s family reportedly sought to surprise the former sheriff Tuesday with a 30-year-old Mexican national whom they detained on suspicion of having entered the country illegally.
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Texans Elect First Jewish Speaker

Joe Straus, a Republican from San Antonio who has been elected speaker of the Texas House of Representatives, is the first Jew to hold the position since Texas became a state. What do you think?
  • "Stupid, deceptively Christian-sounding surname. They should really list candidates' faiths on the ballot."

    Brady Roren Collections Manager
  • "And people say we aren't progressive! Why just the other—quick! Look down. Here comes a black man."

    Ian Posdal Office Assistant
  • "This is clear evidence that the dialectical nature of cultural politics eventually creates pathways for Jews to adapt to traditionally non-Semitic institutions. Y'all."

    Chloe Ballwahn Professor

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