Texas Passes Sweeping Abortion Restrictions

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Cake Just Sitting There

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CHICAGO—Assuring you that there was nothing to worry about and not a soul around who would see you, sources confirmed Tuesday that a large piece of chocolate cake was just sitting there and that you should go ahead and take it.

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With over $1 billion spent in the 2016 presidential race alone, campaign donations continue to cause much controversy and even confusion for their role in shaping politics. Here is a step-by-step guide to how the average American’s political donation travels through a campaign

Roommate Skulking Around Edge Of Party Like Victorian Ghost Child

SEATTLE—Appearing initially in the far corner of the living room and then several minutes later on the threshold between the kitchen and the hallway, local roommate Kelsey Stahl was, by multiple accounts, seen skulking around the edge of a house party Friday like a Victorian ghost child.
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Texas Passes Sweeping Abortion Restrictions

Despite an 11-hour filibuster by state senator Wendy Davis two weeks earlier, the Texas legislature passed strict abortion limits during a special session called by Governor Rick Perry, likely resulting in the closure of all but five of the state’s abortion clinics. What do you think?

  • “This is really going to screw up my dream of getting an abortion in all 50 states.”

    Robin Weaver Escalator Constructor
  • “Luckily, I still have a number of painful and potentially deadly ways to take care of this myself.”

    Erin August Actress
  • “Here’s a thought experiment: What if men could get pregnant, and what if one hapless scientist had to be the first one to try it?”

    James Barron Housekeeper


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