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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Texas Running Out Of Execution Drug

A spokesman for the Texas Department of Criminal Justice confirmed that the state, which has the nation’s highest rate of executions, is running low on the lethal injection drug pentobarbital and would exhaust its supply in September. What do you think?

  • “Texas needs to take a good, hard look at their restocking procedures.”

    Jonathan Clarkson Dried Beef Packer
  • “They can pass the time by bringing inmates to a series of execution fake-outs.”

    Robin Zola Systems Analyst
  • “Texans are resilient people. I’m sure they’ll find a way.”

    Bradley Henriques Gold Plater
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