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How Amazon Plans To Expand

After years of rapid growth and expansion into new industries, Amazon recently announced that it would be opening a second headquarters outside of Seattle. Here are Amazon’s plans for continued growth.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Archivists Unearth Rare Early Career Paul Newman Salsa

WESTPORT, CT—Shedding light on the formative years of the late actor and philanthropist, researchers cataloging the personal archives of Paul Newman confirmed Friday they had uncovered a long-forgotten salsa from early in his career.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.

Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Tide Debuts New Sour Apple Detergent Pods

CINCINNATI—Calling it the perfect choice for consumers looking to add some tartness to their laundry, Procter and Gamble on Tuesday unveiled a new sour apple Tide detergent pod.

The iPhone Turns 10

A decade ago today, Apple released the iPhone and revolutionized the way humans use technology. Here’s a look back at the evolution of the iPhone:
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The 10K Dow

On March 29, the Dow Jones made history, closing above 10,000 points for the first time ever. What do you think about Wall Street's unprecedented vigor?
  • "Damn. I knew I should have invested my money in stocks instead of food."

    Patrick Glynn Cab Driver
  • "Ten thousand points doesn't seem like that much. I regularly reach that on the Dig Dug machine at the Hyper-Mart."

    Lester Hodges Investment Banker
  • "Everything's wonderful! Let's celebrate America's runaway prosperity by playing 'Yes! We Have No Bananas' on the phonograph again!"

    Felicia Hassler Systems Analyst
  • "Some say money is the root of all evil. Then again, some say love, it is a river that drowns the tender reed."

    Jen Kobel Set Designer
  • "This gives me hope that perhaps someday my income will break the $10,000 mark."

    Edward Burris Cashier
  • "Forgive me if I do not congratulate your 'Dow' as it soars to ever-loftier heights. I am still mourning my lost son Icarus, whose hubris and folly made him fly too close to the sun."

    Robert Stearns Architect

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Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

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