The 9/11 Panel Report

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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The 9/11 Panel Report

The 9/11 Commission's final report, released last week, cited many failures on the part of the U.S. government. What do you think?
  • "I read the whole report cover to cover. Turns out it was terrorists."

    Laurie Fredette
    Ticket Taker
  • "Osama, Osama, Osama! Can't we have a commission about something nice for a change?"

    Matthew Dort
  • "I'm glad it's over. The way that investigation was dragging on, I was almost beginning to wish that 9/11 had never even happened."

    Ralph Gagliano
  • "I wrote a report about 8/20 that I think you should read. It's called My Birthday And What I Want For It."

    Joseph Jones
  • "Great timing! I just finished Bergdorf Blondes, and I've been looking for another good beach read."

    Karen Farr
  • "Eh, the whole thing is pretty tame. Now, Ken Starr—there was a man who could write a juicy report."

    Jeffery Koeshal
    Systems Analyst