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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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The Clone Wars

Across the U.S. and on Capitol Hill, debate is raging on the issue of human cloning. What do you think?
  • "Cloning? Why? Aren't most Americans pretty much exactly alike as it is?"

    Lisa Rossiter Florist
  • "We really have no idea what kind of profound ramifications this could have on future generations, and on life on this planet as a whole. Let's find out."

    Dan Preece Truck Driver
  • "Cloning forces us to ask some hard questions. For example, which person, the original or the clone, gets to wear the goatee and be evil?"

    Stewart Nicholls Cashier
  • "Can we clone a bulletproof Kurt Cobain? He was a sun that set too soon."

    Danielle Yates Student
  • "Anything that puts more people on the planet is okay by me."

    Bill Barron Systems Analyst
  • "Didn't the world learn its lesson when test-tube baby Louise grew to 60 feet tall and rampaged across London?"

    Ken Bould Architect
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