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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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The Dixie Chicks Controversy

The members of Dixie Chicks have been the focus of boycotts ever since saying they are ashamed to hail from the same state as President Bush. What do you think?
  • "I recently hosted a Dixie Chicks CD burning, but it was because the brown-haired one got fat."

    Rick Barros Taxi Driver
  • "Do you think we could get Shania Twain to speak out against the president, too?"

    Marcus Adams Attorney
  • "The only country artist qualified to express his political views is Johnny Cash, because that man's seen it all. And he once torched a forest while tripping on mescaline."

    Alan Cramer Systems Analyst
  • "So the Dixie Chicks are against the war? I suppose next, they'll be speaking out against the General Lee jumping over a crick."

    Omar Williams Cashier
  • "The Dixie Chicks should leave the opinion-giving to the professionals. Like that guy with the 'boot up your ass' song."

    Theresa Krug Librarian
  • "Lost in this whole controversy is one important point: That the Dixie Chicks' music profoundly blows."

    Melissa Spence Graduate Student
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