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The Fed's Bank Bailout

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Jogger Clearly On First Run Of Plan To Turn Life Around

CHICAGO—Taking note of the man’s beat-up tennis shoes, sweat-drenched shirt, and ill-fitting pair of sweatpants as he made his way down the sidewalk, witnesses reported Tuesday that area jogger Dan Andreychuk was clearly out on his very first run of a plan to turn his life around.

What’s At Stake In New Hampshire

With the New Hampshire primary election Tuesday poised to impact the course of the 2016 presidential race, The Onion examines what’s at stake for the candidates
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • How Theaters Are Trying To Win Back Moviegoers

    The number of Americans who went to the movies hit a 20-year low in 2014, leaving theaters scrambling to find ways to incentivize the public to see new releases on the big screen rather than watch films at home or on the internet. Here are some methods theaters are using to win back audiences and increase box office sales:

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The Fed's Bank Bailout

The Federal Reserve announced that they would be setting up a $200 billion program to assist struggling banks. What do you think?
  • "They say that you can judge the heart of a country by its treatment of its banks."

    Bingham Irving
    Computer Programmer
  • "They should give it all to my branch—they have really crappy lollipops."

    Joe Pullman
    Construction Worker
  • "Giving money to institutions that failed at their only job, which was to have money, may not be the best strategy."

    Lynn Fitzpatrick
    Florist

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