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Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

Joe Arpaio’s Family Surprises Him With Detained Hispanic Motorist

FOUNTAIN HILLS, AZ—In celebration of the dismissal of his conviction for criminal contempt via presidential pardon, Joe Arpaio’s family reportedly sought to surprise the former sheriff Tuesday with a 30-year-old Mexican national whom they detained on suspicion of having entered the country illegally.
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The Missing Intern

Four months after her disappearance, the search continues for Chandra Levy, the 24-year-old intern who had an affair with Rep. Gary Condit (D-CA). What do you think?
  • "For years, men have been screwing women and then vanishing. But one woman does it, and there's all this hoop-de-doo."

    Donald Bumbry Systems Analyst
  • "Man, the Democrats sure do love those intern Jewesses."

    Hal Murray File Clerk
  • "I am enraged by Condit's evasiveness. Just tell us, yes or no: Did you have butt sex?"

    Fred Singleton Cashier
  • "While the police are at it, they should find out where my intern is. I asked for those copies 20 minutes ago!"

    Richard Sakata Attorney
  • "I've been missing for almost two years now, and it still hasn't made the news."

    Jill Roenicke Biologist
  • "I hope this finally shows our young people that there's no future in fucking politicians."

    Diana Dempsey Speech Pathologist

More from this section

Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

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