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The New Reagan Biography

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Michelle Obama: ‘Well, There Are 8 Years Of My Life I’ll Never Get Back’

PHILADELPHIA—Her face fixed in an expression of apathetic detachment as she took the stage Monday night to raucous cheers and applause, First Lady Michelle Obama reportedly began her address to the Democratic National Convention by exhaling audibly and remarking that she would never get the past eight years of her life back.

Revelations From The DNC Email Leak

Last week, WikiLeaks posted 20,000 email exchanges among DNC officials, the content of which led to DNC chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s resignation on the eve of the convention. Here are some of the key revelations from the leak

CNN Producer On Hunt For Saddest-Looking Fuck With Convention Button Collection

PHILADELPHIA—Weaving his way through the crowd of patriotically dressed attendees excitedly milling around on the floor of the Democratic National Convention, CNN segment producer Jeff Raskin reportedly went on the hunt Monday for the most pitiful-looking fuck willing to speak on camera about their political button collection.

Trump Casually Informs Pence He Going To Make One Or Two Appearances During Speech

CLEVELAND—Pulling his running mate aside backstage at the Republican National Convention just minutes before the Indiana governor was scheduled to formally accept the party’s vice presidential nomination, GOP candidate Donald Trump casually informed Mike Pence that he would probably make one or two quick appearances during the Midwestern conservative’s headlining speech tonight.
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The New Reagan Biography

Edmund Morris' new Reagan biography, Dutch: A Memoir Of Ronald Reagan, is drawing fire for its use of fictionalized characters and events. What do you think of this controversial "biographical novel"?
  • "The Reagan bio may be partly fictional, but I don't mind. That means it should correspond pretty closely with my memories of his administration."

    Iris Roberts Botanist
  • "Okay, first of all, he was American, not Dutch."

    Wendy Mattson Guidance Counselor
  • "I'm not a big fan of Reagan or his politics, but I must admit, the story of how he came to Earth from the doomed planet Krypton was pretty impressive."

    Rick Hurst Systems Analyst
  • "I was pretty sure Reagan never unmade the Ring Of Power by throwing it into the cracks of Mount Doom. Then it turned out Amazon fucked up and sent me the wrong book."

    Fred Boulware Carpenter
  • "This book is total bullshit. No American president would ever lay a memorial wreath at a Nazi cemetery."

    Chris Kennard Train Conductor
  • "As a devoted admirer of the great Ronald Reagan, I have only one thing to say: I must be really stupid or something."

    James Holt Orthodontist

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