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Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

Joe Arpaio’s Family Surprises Him With Detained Hispanic Motorist

FOUNTAIN HILLS, AZ—In celebration of the dismissal of his conviction for criminal contempt via presidential pardon, Joe Arpaio’s family reportedly sought to surprise the former sheriff Tuesday with a 30-year-old Mexican national whom they detained on suspicion of having entered the country illegally.
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The Tax-Cut Proposal

In his first major initiative as president, George W. Bush is lobbying hard for a controversial $1.6 trillion tax cut. What do you think?
  • "Finally, the burden of raising a family on a meager factory-job salary will be lifted slightly. What? It won't? Damn."

    Sunil Bardeekian Forklift Operator
  • "Is this one of those things that sounds great but only benefits the rich? Or is it one of those genuinely great, fairytale things that never really happens?"

    Hillary Green Art Historian
  • "I'm not sure what to make of all this. Can I get back to you after tonight's O'Reilly Factor?"

    Jill Yablonsky Homemaker
  • "A 10-year, $1.6 trillion cut to revive a softening economy and rein in spending impulses in Congress? Four words: Party at my place!"

    Frank Muncie Systems Analyst
  • "Income tax? Geez, I thought that highway toll I paid when we went to Taste Of Chicago last year took care of everything."

    Bill Bohnert Custodian
  • "This would be a tremendous boon to me and my fellow corporate titans if any of us actually paid taxes."

    Tom Wilhoyte CEO

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Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

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