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The Winter Olympics

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Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
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The Winter Olympics

The 18th Olympic Winter Games began this week, turning the world's attention to Nagano, Japan. What do you think about the arrival of this quadrennial athletic event?
  • "Yeah! Time to kick some Towelhead butt! USA! USA! Oh, the Olympics? Shit. I thought you said 'war.'"

    Tyler Hunt Shipping Clerk
  • "You know, I was just saying the other day that there isn't enough ice-skating on television."

    Larry Baer Architect
  • "There is nothing more thrilling than watching spandex-clad Aryans lay on top of each other at high speeds via nine-hour tape delay from Japan."

    Roy Strypczynski Systems Analyst
  • "Olympics? I think I ate there once. They have, like, cheeseburgers and gyros and stuff, right?"

    David Puhl Construction Worker
  • "Thank goodness they've added Autumn Olympics in 1999 and Spring Olympics in 2001. No year is complete without a once-every-four-years Olympic competition."

    Caroline Kelley Student
  • "I am so excited, I'm going to run out and use my Visa card right now."

    Marie Colquitt Civil Engineer

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