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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Thomas The Tank Engine Theme Park Announced

Massachusetts heritage railroad site Edaville USA has announced that it will soon break ground on a theme park based on the children’s television series Thomas the Tank Engine. What do you think?

  • “Thank God they’re finally building a theme park my kids will never drag me to.”

    Allie Maserole Focus Group Coordinator
  • “Yet another reason to visit Edaville!”

    Carl Stepp Magnet Tester
  • “I still don’t get how this would be more fun than just hanging out at a regular train station.”

    Eric Nathe Key Clerk

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