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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Tom DeLay Steps Down

Rep. Tom DeLay (R-TX) was recently indicted on charges of conspiracy in a campaign-financing scheme, and forced to temporarily step down as House majority leader. What do you think?
  • "They'll never make those charges stick! No jail can hold Tom DeLay!"

    Todd Eldridge Painter
  • "My prayers are with the poor, leaderless House Republican majority tonight."

    Andy Rocco Chef
  • "I don't want to jump to conclusions here, but it seems like absolute power might have some effect on people."

    Kathy Ross Seamstress
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