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Tom Snyder Dead At 71

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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Tom Snyder Dead At 71

Late night talk-show host Tom Snyder died Sunday after a long battle with leukemia. What do you think?
  • "It's not inconceivable that, even in this state, he could get another show."

    Ben Weissman Grocer
  • "He'll be missed. He had that unique quality where no matter how much he knew about the people he was interviewing, he still sounded dated and out of touch."

    Robert Green Safety Inspector
  • "I'll miss his boisterous laugh. It always woke me up when I had fallen asleep on the couch."

    Ellen Clarke Product Tester

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