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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Top Al-Qaeda Escapee

It was recently announced that Omar al-Farouq, a top al-Qaeda operative, was among four prisoners to escape a U.S.-run prison in Afghanistan last July. What do you think?
  • "You can't destroy al-Qaeda, you can only contain it. Oh, we can't do that either?"

    Dan Woodruff Exterminator
  • "If he came out of a stump on the other side of the fence, that's hilarious."

    Maya Schultz Actuary
  • "Does this mean I should restock my duct tape?"

    Ron Chapell Painter

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