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Politics

Bill O’Reilly Tearfully Packs Up Framed Up-Skirt Photos From Desk

NEW YORK—Smiling wistfully as he gazed at the cherished mementos that had sat on his desk for much of the past 20 years, former Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly reportedly grew teary-eyed Thursday as he packed up the framed up-skirt photos from his work space following his termination by the cable channel.

Donald Trump Jr. Takes Son On Hunting Trip In National Zoo

WASHINGTON—In what he referred to as an important rite of passage for his 8-year-old son, Donald John III, Donald Trump Jr. took his eldest boy to the Smithsonian National Zoological Park for his first-ever hunting trip, sources said Wednesday.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
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Trent Lott Resigns

Trent Lott, the second-ranking Republican in the Senate, announced that he would be leaving office at the end of the year. What do you think?
  • "See, you don't have to wait for a public disgrace before quitting. You can do it two, or even three weeks before."

    Angel McCaskey Book Seller
  • "With Lott's announcement and Dog the Bounty Hunter's cancellation, white supremacy really took one on the chin this month."

    Phil Windstrup Systems Analyst
  • "This is a great loss for our country, but a huge gain for the principle of decency."

    Kevin Potter Craftsman

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