Trying Children As Adults

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How Apple Plans To Rebound From Apple Watch Flop

With sales of the Apple Watch reportedly down 90 percent since its initial release, Apple is suffering in the wearables market and faces a lack of enthusiasm about its latest product. Here are some ways Apple can improve the watch and prevent the company from falling into a slump:

Horrifying Police Body Camera Footage Clearly Shows Current State Of America

CINCINNATI—Following a traffic stop earlier this month by a University of Cincinnati police officer that ended in the shooting death of an unarmed black motorist, authorities confirmed Thursday that the disturbing video recorded by the officer’s body camera clearly and graphically shows the current state of America.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Preparedness

  • Doctors Recommend Getting 8 Centuries Of Cryosleep

    STANFORD, CA—Claiming that the practice is essential for effectively recharging the body and waking fully rested and alert, doctors at Stanford University issued a report Monday emphasizing the importance of getting at least eight centuries of atomi...

Trying Children As Adults

Last week, a Michigan jury convicted a 13-year-old boy of second-degree murder for a crime he committed as an 11-year-old. What do you think of the growing legal trend of trying children as adults?
  • "As a federal judge and longtime closet pederast, I am strongly in favor of trying 11-year-olds as adults."

    Stanley Gibson
    Federal Judge
  • "I hope the adult courts have some of those plastic booster chairs."

    Liz Strunck
    Teacher
  • "I do not believe minors should be allowed to shoot people, nor do I believe their victims should be allowed to die."

    Hannah Leigh
    Psychologist
  • "Come on, people, didn't any of you go through a rebellious homicidal phase during adolescence? You grow out of it."

    John Roble
    Bartender
  • "I believe the children are our future: nasty, brutish and short."

    Bill Buchanan
    Systems Analyst
  • "Children should face the same consequences as adults for committing murder: four years in a federal penitentiary."

    Daniel Doering
    File Clerk