adBlockCheck

Recent News

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
End Of Section
  • More News

TSA To Allow Small Knives On Planes

Partially reversing rules that have been in place since the 9/11 attacks, the Transportation Security Administration announced that it would begin allowing passengers to bring pocketknives with blades shorter than 2.36 inches onto planes beginning on April 25. What do you think?

  • “The catch is you’re still not allowed to stab people with them.”

    Andrew Borrowman Clam Sorter
  • “Finally. It’s so annoying when you’ve brought all these strawberries on a plane and have nothing to finely chop them with.”

    Kurt Montoya Ammonia Still Operator
  • “I think you should be able to carry either a knife or shampoo. Not both.”

    Meagan Lema Roofing Supervisor

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close