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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:
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Two New Elements To Be Named

The International Union of Pure Applied Chemistry unveiled two new elements last week, tentatively named flerovium and livermorium. What do you think?

  • "I was about to give up on science and become religious. This is just the kind of thing I need to keep my interest! Go science!"

    Frank Alger Hand Embroiderer
  • "Son of a bitch! I should have known there was some sneaky reason that stack of periodic tables was so cheap."

    Alexandra Zigmunt Hook Puller
  • "I was wondering when they’d add a new element and finally get the bad taste of roentgenium out of my mouth. What a shitty element that was."

    Roy Craig Pay-Station Attendant
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