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Woman Conducting Ongoing Scientific Experiment On Own Skin

DULUTH, MN—Noting her methodic applications of various chemical agents in carefully controlled combinations, sources confirmed Wednesday that local woman Sara Holloway has been carrying out an open-ended scientific experiment on her own skin.

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Ultra-HD "4K" Televisions Replacing 3D TVs In Stores

Five years after the industry touted 3D TVs as the future of home entertainment, manufacturers at Monday’s International Consumer Electronics Show announced that they are phasing out their 3D TV lineups in favor of Ultra-HD “4K" televisions capable of showing video at four times the pixel resolution of standard HDTVs. What do you think?

  • “I was just saying how the image on my crystal clear 60-inch, high-definition television isn’t sharp enough.”

    Kevin McCreary Independent Trader
  • "They really expect me to go back to watching Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole in 2D?"

    Rachel LeClair Grand Piano Tuner
  • “3D, 4K, what’s next? A higher number followed by a different letter? I bet that would be pretty cool.”

    Dustin Milburn Label Remover
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