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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.
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Ultra-HD "4K" Televisions Replacing 3D TVs In Stores

Five years after the industry touted 3D TVs as the future of home entertainment, manufacturers at Monday’s International Consumer Electronics Show announced that they are phasing out their 3D TV lineups in favor of Ultra-HD “4K" televisions capable of showing video at four times the pixel resolution of standard HDTVs. What do you think?

  • “I was just saying how the image on my crystal clear 60-inch, high-definition television isn’t sharp enough.”

    Kevin McCreary Independent Trader
  • "They really expect me to go back to watching Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole in 2D?"

    Rachel LeClair Grand Piano Tuner
  • “3D, 4K, what’s next? A higher number followed by a different letter? I bet that would be pretty cool.”

    Dustin Milburn Label Remover

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