U.N. To Look For Genocide In Darfur

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Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.

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U.N. To Look For Genocide In Darfur

Last week, U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan set up a commission to determine whether genocide has taken place in the Darfur region of Sudan. What do you think?
  • "So this might have been a genocide after all, and not a civil war in which only one side was fighting."

    Harold Mercer
    Systems Analyst
  • "I think the U.N. is going to find that the blame lies with all the Sudanese rap music that glamorizes genocide."

    Amber Hughes
    Program Aide
  • "I don't know why the U.N. is getting involved in the first place. I also don't know what 'U.N.' stands for."

    Tom Cook
    Salesman
  • "I think the entire world will breathe a sigh of relief if the U.N. finds that it is not genocide. Well, everyone except for the half-million people who were murdered there."

    Patrick Zink
    Administrator
  • "Darfur, Darfur, Darfur. That's all you ever hear these days. That, and the ongoing slaughter of civilians at the hands of government troops and Maoist rebels in Nepal."

    Teodoro Manzo
    Roofer
  • "I sure hope the U.N. determines it was a genocide. Otherwise, none of the Sudanese will be covered under their genocide insurance."

    Norma Carrigan
    Appraiser
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