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‘SportsCenter’ Co-Anchors Clearly Dating

BRISTOL, CT—Saying that the pair could barely take their eyes off one another throughout the hour-long sports news program, ESPN viewers told reporters Friday that it is increasingly clear SportsCenter anchors John Anderson and Matt Barrie are currently dating.

Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.
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Universal Health Care For San Francisco

The San Francisco Board of Supervisors recently passed a measure to make free health care available to all of the city's uninsured. What do you think?
  • "First they make a mockery of my bitter, loveless marriage, now they make a mockery of my restrictive overpriced health care. Is nothing sacred to these monsters?"

    Henry Gaven
    Historian
  • "Wow, free health care. And all you have to do is live within the bounds of the city with the third highest cost of living in the country."

    Lexie Martin
    Building Mover
  • "I'm fine with this as long as there's an opt-out provision for people who prefer to be sick."

    James Palmer
    Nursing Student
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