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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Unlicensed Plumber and Tax-Evader Endorses McCain

Samuel J. Wurzelbacher, better known as Joe the Plumber, has publicly endorsed McCain. What do you think?
  • "Eh, I'm 10 times more the working stiff than that jerk. I mean, look at me. I'm harnessed to a wagon full of coal."

    Ethan Goodwiler Laborer
  • "What was this guy's deal again? He was the king of the plumbers or something like that, right?"

    Gerald Henslue Furnace Installer
  • "You know, I really want to like people like Joe the Plumber, but they do a half-assed job fixing my plumbing, cut me off in traffic, and don't move an inch when their dog attacks mine at the park."

    Diedre Anderson Network Administrator

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