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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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U.S. 17th Happiest Country In World

According to the 2013 World Happiness Report released earlier this week, the United States is the seventeenth happiest country on the planet, ranking behind our neighbors Canada and Mexico, which came in sixth and sixteenth, respectively. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, but I feel like thirteenth!”

    Marly Rasch Wallpaper Printer
  • “Canada probably thinks happiness is looking at a tree or something. Mexico is simply lying.”

    Van Smith Oil Pipe Inspector
  • “Why would they conduct that study before the iPhone 5S came out?”

    Tony Ugel Ice Cutter

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