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The Life Of Diana, Princess Of Wales

Today marks 20 years since the funeral of Princess Diana, known to many as the “people’s princess.” The Onion looks back at the life of Princess Diana before it was cut tragically short.

Study: Other Countries Weird

BOSTON—Examining a wide variety of cross-cultural data, a Boston University study released Monday determined that other countries are weird.

Japanese Family Puts Aging Robot In Retirement Home

KYOTO, JAPAN—Saying the move to the assisted care facility was the right decision after so many years of operation, members of the Akiyama family finally put their aging robot in a retirement home, sources reported Friday.

North Korea Successfully Detonates Nuclear Scientist

PYONGYANG—Hailing it as a significant step forward for their ballistic weapons program just hours after suffering a failed missile launch, North Korean leaders announced Monday they had successfully detonated a nuclear scientist.
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U.S. Deserters Not Safe in Canada

Canada, long considered a safe haven for deserters from the United States armed forces, have been toughening their stance against Americans seeking not to serve. What do you think?
  • "I don't understand what the problem is for Canada. American deserters are the best in the world."

    Scott Diego Fireman
  • "Oh, come on. At least let them stay for rest of the Toronto Jazz Festival."

    Alex Nathan Meteorologist
  • "What? I thought we had a deal: Canada accepts our military deserters and we make a celebrity out of Alan Thicke."

    Heather Kwilos Phone Saleswoman

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