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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

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DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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U.S. Facing Helium Shortage

With its helium reserves rapidly depleting, the United States faces a shortage expected to have a detrimental effect on certain sectors of the economy. What do you think?

  • “Ah, the hell with balloons anyway. They were useless for getting me well soon.”

    Jerry Faulk Lifeguard
  • “Greetings, earthling. We come in peace. See? Not as funny without the helium, is it?”

    Dana Creamer Systems Analyst
  • “As a dirigible pilot since 1935, I thank God for an excuse to get out of this fucking business.”

    Gary William Delineator

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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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