U.S. Infant-Mortality High

In This Section

Vol 42 Issue 19

CIA Nominee Violated Privacy

Michael Hayden, Bush's nominee to head the CIA, has recently been implicated in the NSA's controversial collection of private phone records. What do...

Drug Tested On Children

A recently uncovered study revealed that pharmaceutical giant Pfizer tested an unapproved meningitis drug on children in Nigeria without their...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Healthy Living

  • The Onion’s Guide To Gym Etiquette

    Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.

Sleep

U.S. Infant-Mortality High

In a survey of 33 industrialized nations, the United States was shown to have the second-worst infant-mortality rate. What do you think?
  • "Hey, don't put this at my feet. I stopped shaking my babies months ago."

    Kate Thornton
    Career Counselor
  • "Fucking unpatriotic dead babies making the United States look bad."

    Alan Kincaid
    Switchboard Operator
  • "Number two? This is bullshit!"

    Kevin Kolski
    Systems Analyst
Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More