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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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U.S. Wins Its First Olympic Gold Medal In Ice Dancing

U.S. Olympic skating pair Meryl Davis and Charlie White took home the gold medal in Ice Dancing on Monday with their free-skate performance of “Scheherazade,” the first time the United States has won a gold medal in the event. What do you think?

  • “This is just the pick-me-up we needed after Iraq and Afghanistan.”

    David Belcher Unemployed
  • “See, people say the Winter Olympics has limited appeal, but then you get an interpretive ballroom ice-dance version of a 19th-century symphony about an Arabian fable, and who can’t get on board?”

    Sean Glover Parade Organizer
  • “My bookie really took a bath on this one.”

    Lilly Baker Special Education Instructor
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