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Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.

Fermilab Receives Generous Anonymous Particle Donation

BATAVIA, IL—Calling it the most substantial private donation the research facility has received in years, officials at the Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory announced Monday that an anonymous benefactor had given them a generous particle donation.

God Excited About First Trip To Japan

THE HEAVENS—After years of talking about visiting the East Asian country, God, Our Lord and Heavenly Father, told reporters Monday that He was excited to finally be taking His first trip to Japan.
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Vanilla Ice To Work With Amish In New TV Show

Rapper Vanilla Ice will star in a reality show on the DIY Network titled Vanilla Ice Goes Amish, in which the “Ice Ice Baby” singer will live among an Amish community in Ohio to learn their construction methods. What do you think?

  • “I’ll give him two weeks tops before he loses it for lack of zippers.”

    Daniel Aronson Pewter Caster
  • “Must be weird for the Amish to participate in a project where they’re not the punch line.”

    Charla Mason Limousine Driver
  • “This is a total rip-off of Hammer Goes Hasidic.”

    Ken Carr Insole Buffer

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