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Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
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Vatican Blames Man-Made Emissions For Global Warming

A scientific panel convened by the Vatican called upon people to work to reduce the emission of greenhouse gasses to slow global climate change. What do you think?

  • “If the Church can go from forgiving Galileo to accepting global warming in 11 years, I figure they’re on track to admit God doesn’t exist by 2015.”

    Aiden Theart Systems Analyst
  • "It's all there in the story of the ass who tricked Jephtha into producing carbon dioxide."

    Sophia Lambert Tabber
  • "Sounds like God and science have some kind of cross-promotional thing going on. As an ad man, I respect that."

    Anthony Adams Advertising Agent

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