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What Is Trump’s Relationship With White Nationalism?

Since the weekend’s violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, many have criticized President Trump for his failure to outright condemn the white supremacists involved. The Onion breaks down Trump’s relationship to this powerful hate group.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

ALEXANDRIA, VA—Saying she hadn’t missed a summer since she was on the U.S. Court of Appeals, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said Tuesday that she had once again returned to her off-season lifeguarding job at Splash Central waterpark.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.

Contents Of The Voyager Golden Record

Forty years ago this week, NASA launched Voyager 2, which carries a gold-plated record featuring pictures and sounds from Earth as well as scientific information, all of which was carefully compiled in anticipation of a possible extraterrestrial encounter. Here are the contents of the record:
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Venezuela Running Out Of Toilet Paper

Government mismanagement has left toilet paper in short supply in Venezuela, causing long lines to form throughout the country to purchase the rapidly dwindling item, and prompting lawmakers to call for the immediate importation of 50 million rolls. What do you think?

  • “See, this is why Chavez was such a huge proponent of bidets.”

    Nikita Nikolic Unemployed
  • “They better make sure it’s two-ply or they’ll end up right back where they started in a week.”

    Dennis Fogarty Chain Repairer
  • “What are they, a bunch of fragile flowers? Just use coffee filters like everyone else who runs out.”

    Peter Houseman Oven Operator

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