Wal-Mart Sales Disappointing

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Local Household Announces Plans To Overdo Halloween Again

HIGHLAND PARK, IL—Having hauled over a dozen boxes of lights and plastic decorations as well as a large black-cat-shaped lawn inflatable from storage, members of the Hutchcroft family announced to neighbors from their front yard Thursday their plan to completely overdo Halloween again this year.

Wal-Mart Sales Disappointing

While post-Thanksgiving sales were up 6 percent from last year for most retailers, Wal-Mart's numbers fell below even their modest forecast. What do you think?
  • “Their customer base has dropped way off since they started stocking the morning-after pill.”

    Ronnie Warren
    Oil Changer
  • “You can only give someone a T-shirt of the Tasmanian Devil waving an America flag so many times.”

    Karen Wachtel
    Events Planner
  • “Wal-Mart just doesn't carry the same piece-of-shit bullshit I like to give to my loved ones that they used to.”

    Chuck Bryant
    Lab Technician