Wal-Mart Shutters New York Fashion Presence

In This Section

Vol 47 Issue 43

Bill Simmons Somehow Still Writing About 2010 NBA Season

LOS ANGELES—With the NBA lockout having already resulted in the cancellation of many games this fall, ESPN.com and Grantland columnist Bill Simmons is somehow managing to churn out upwards of 3,000 words per week on the NBA by continuing to write ab...

FAA To Ban Plane Crashes

WASHINGTON—In what officials are calling "a much-needed policy shift," the Federal Aviation Administration announced this weekend that it would ban all plane crashes.

Man's Utter Failure In Life A Bit Of A Sore Spot

MADISONVILLE, TN—Sources close to local man Mike Ferguson confirmed Saturday that over time they have learned not to bring up their friend's utter failure to achieve anything whatsoever in life, a sensitive topic they said has always been a bit of a...

Lions Fans Excited To Be Booing Again

DETROIT—After their team dropped its second-straight game Sunday, Detroit Lions fans told reporters they were thrilled to get back to booing the hapless franchise.
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Customer Service

Fantasy Sports

Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled

RED BANK, NJ—After watching the 11-year-old give up the fourth straight double that inning, sources confirmed Sunday afternoon that local Little League pitcher Dustin Bauer is getting absolutely fucking shelled out there.

Wal-Mart Shutters New York Fashion Presence

Two years after relocating its fashion offices to New York, retail giant Wal-Mart announced it was moving the division back to Arkansas. What do you think?

  • "It’s about time they stopped chasing all those big-city fashion trends like zippers."

    Emily Kohler
    Systems Analyst
  • "They shouldn't feel too bad. Wal-Mart certainly isn’t the first multinational corporation to pack its failed New York dreams into a beat-up old suitcase and buy a one-way ticket back home."

    Drew LaFollete
    Power Line Examiner
  • "That's great! I always enjoy hearing about history's most profitable corporations finding various ways to save money."

    Tom Schmederman
    Wax Bleacher
Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More