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Weaves, Braids May Hasten Balding Process

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Obama Resigns From Presidency After Michelle Lands Dream Job In Seattle

‘It’s Time I Made Some Sacrifices For This Family,’ Reports President

WASHINGTON—Saying his wife of 24 years had already sacrificed so much for the sake of his career and that it was time to return the favor, Barack Obama announced Wednesday his resignation as president of the United States of America, effective immediately, following news that Michelle Obama had landed her dream job in Seattle.

High School Nurse Getting Pretty Good At Spotting Morning Sickness

FAIRFIELD, ME―Having seen more students than she can remember come into her office with complaints of nausea and vomiting over the years, Fairfield High School nurse Sarah Bromti told reporters Wednesday she’s getting to the point where she can identify morning sickness without much trouble.

Jogger Clearly On First Run Of Plan To Turn Life Around

CHICAGO—Taking note of the man’s beat-up tennis shoes, sweat-drenched shirt, and ill-fitting pair of sweatpants as he made his way down the sidewalk, witnesses reported Tuesday that area jogger Dan Andreychuk was clearly out on his very first run of a plan to turn his life around.

What’s At Stake In New Hampshire

With the New Hampshire primary election Tuesday poised to impact the course of the 2016 presidential race, The Onion examines what’s at stake for the candidates
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Weaves, Braids May Hasten Balding Process

A study of 326 black women revealed that a quarter of them were suffering from baldness that may be linked to hairstyles that tug at the scalp, such as braids or weaves. What do you think?

  • "Hmm. I'll have to check with my one black friend to see if that's true."

    Mary Bloom
    Career Counselor
  • "It makes me glad that, in one very small way, the universe has finally started to treat black women and rich old white men with utter equality."

    Keith Roester
    Sea Transport Worker
  • "Big shout-out to my black sisters. I want to wish them the peace and strength to deal with that whole janky weave thing."

    Finn Castellano
    Animal Control Worker

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