Web Hits 100 Million Sites

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Horrifying Police Body Camera Footage Clearly Shows Current State Of America

CINCINNATI—Following a traffic stop earlier this month by a University of Cincinnati police officer that ended in the shooting death of an unarmed black motorist, authorities confirmed Thursday that the disturbing video recorded by the officer’s body camera clearly and graphically shows the current state of America.

Deadline For Prior User To Remove Clothes From Dryer Extended 5 Minutes

JOHNSON CITY, TN—Upon finding the machine in her apartment building’s laundry room completely untouched since she last stopped by, exasperated local woman Sandra Hermus reportedly mounted all her magnanimity Monday and extended the deadline for the previous user to remove their clothing from the dryer by five minutes.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Area Man

This Great Song, Bar Sources Report

TOMAH, WI—Pausing their conversations momentarily to call attention to the music playing on the establishment’s jukebox, sources at local bar Shepherd’s confirmed to reporters Friday that this is a great song.

Good Times

Web Hits 100 Million Sites

According to Internet-monitoring company Netcraft, there are now 100 million websites with unique domain names. What do you think?
  • “100 million and one. Say hello to my new online petition at theinternetistoobig.com.”

    Babette Crain
    Lighting Designer
  • “That's just too many darn choices. I remember back when it was only w3.org and the alt.hypertext newsgroup. Man, those were the days.”

    Evan Meyers
    Systems Analyst
  • “Really? Because I could have sworn I've been to at least 150 million websites.”

    Quincy Daniels
    Pharmacist's Assistant