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Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
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What Do You Think?

Controversial rapper Eminem was recently nominated for four Grammys, sparking protest from groups such as GLAAD and NOW, who say his music promotes violence against gays and women. What do you think?
  • "Eminem should win. On The Marshall Mathers LP, he makes some very trenchant points about sawing off his mom's tits with a chainsaw."

    Marc Andersen Delivery Driver
  • "This is a slap in the face to truly deserving nominees like Don Henley, up for Best Male Rock Vocal Performance for 'Workin' It.'"

    Carl Weatherspoon Investment Banker
  • "You didn't hear Jews complaining back in '89 when Professor Griff won Best Rap Song for 'Wicked Moneylending Vampire Kikes (Killum All).'"

    Mel Dixon Systems Analyst
  • "Eminem deserves to win after being so badly snubbed at last year's Tonys."

    Linda Pulliam Homemaker
  • "They could end this uproar by creating a separate category like Best Album That Never Should Have Been Recorded Because It Is An Affront To All That Is Decent."

    Benjamin Reese Carpenter
  • "It's a trade-off. On the one hand, you risk alienating conservative Grammy voters, but on the other, the Grammys will actually be watched by people."

    Liz Toffler Student

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