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A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.
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Wikipedia Bans Congress From Editing Pages

After a Twitter bot was created to track Wikipedia edits made from congressional IP addresses and anonymous staffers responded by making “disruptive” joke edits to pages on the moon landing and Choco Tacos, the site imposed a 10-day ban on edits originating within the House. What do you think?

  • “So Darrell Issa didn’t invent ‘The Twist’ at Area 51?”

    William Root Coffee Tester
  • “But with Congress out of the way, there’s no one to stop Justice Alito from filling the site with his predictions for the True Blood series finale.”

    Janine Wiggins Clothing Recycler
  • “The rest of us can still post bullshit though, right?”

    John Van Patten Parkour Historian
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